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some political movements i would start if i weren’t lazy

1. As a tall man, I find it ridiculous the height that most shower heads are installed.  We’re in a relatively nice hotel in LA right now, the shower is 3’x6′ and about 10′ tall.  The shower head could have been installed anywhere on the wall.  It could have even been made into a nice outdoor-type shower with a big overhead nozzle or perhaps have been located on an arm that could be rotated up and out over the shower.  I can also only assume that this shower was “built for two.”  But… where’s the shower head installed?  The height is about 6’2″, and it sticks out from the wall no more than 4″.  This gigantic shower, and you have to take it standing in about 10% of the space it takes up.  This shower doesn’t offend me as a tall person, this shower head just offends me as a human.  Totally stupid.  If I weren’t so lazy, I’d do some serious campaigning to make showering better.

2. Fix the fucking post office.  Going to the US Post Office is possibly the worst experience of any given week.  These people are slow, stupid, petty, and, ironically, there’s not enough of them!  The new postage rates (for those of us that have to mail out promos and mailorders all the time), are ridiculous, but…  here’s the thing:  raise the prices even higher, just give me better service.  I don’t want to walk into the 4th Ave. and 10th St. post office and find only 2 people sitting behind the 12 available windows and 35 people in line.  People unite!  This is OUR post office.  We pay for it with our postage.  If any other company had the customer service of the US Post Office, they’d be dead.  But somehow we put up with this shit.

(And… An aside:  has anybody ever been in the post office when they lock the doors WITH A KEY from the inside after closing time, but before the line clears?  What the fuck is that all about?  I mean, I understand the need, but… let’s see a bar do that at 4:00 AM and see how fast they get closed down for fire code violations.  Can you imagine?  Where’s the quality of life violation for that?)

3. This one’s actually political.  It needs a catchy name that I haven’t come up with yet, but the idea is this:  “Kids, educate your grandparents.”  There will always be a giant political gap between the young and the old, and this is an attempt to address that.  I know it’s hard, but, on a purely personal level, the goal would be for each young person to attempt to sway the political opinions of just two older, more conservative, perhaps religious, perhaps rural, etc. people.  The upcoming election is likely to be decided by a small gap… if just 100,000 kids can sway 2 people each to vote against the Republicans, then that would be a 400,000 vote swing.

Now, I’m not saying it would be easy.  It won’t be.  But, there are a plenty of people in the middle of this country who have never been to another part of the world.  They need to understand the way other people view America and Americans.

But even more than that (or perhaps, even, LESS than that).  To just try to convince these folks to give the Dems a chance, even if they don’t agree with it.  To hopefully perhaps to get them to understand that it’s not all intellectual elites, but it’s actually the friends of their grandchildren and that those people are looking for a better life and a better government, and it’s the older, conservative folks that are out of touch with modern life, and city life, that are standing in the way.

Anyway, it’s destined to fail, and I’m describing it all wrong.  But… the idea is alright.  It’s not homegrown, it’s literally HOME.  Hell… buy the vote, trade the vote, say “Grandma, I’ll bring you to NYC for the weekend, and you can see what it’s like, just do this for me.”  Anyway, there’s something to it.  Maybe some day.